


Cost of Redemption

by Shadowkat678



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Minor Character Death, War, tw for violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-21
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-09-23 16:30:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20343184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowkat678/pseuds/Shadowkat678
Summary: Snape wasn't the only Death Eater to turn his back on Lord Voldemort. From his first fight as a Death Eater, to his very last breath, this is the story of R.A.B.





	1. Realization

Multicolored beams twisted and twirled in the darkness like a deadly lightshow as shadowy figures clashed throughout the cobbled streets, a mix of screams and laughter echoing through the night. 

Regulus Black rolled to the ground as a bone breaker curse passed just inches short of crushing his skull before springing back into a dueling crouch. He twisted his neck, trying to pinpoint the exact location of where the spell had been fired, but whoever had cast it was already lost in the chaos of battle 

All around buildings burned into charred heaps as red and orange flames leapt into the sky and smoke swirled out of the fires, leaving the scent of burnt flesh hanging thick in the air. It seared his throat as he breathed, gray eyes gazing out in horror from behind his mask at the destruction. Bodies littered the ground, with more falling even as he watched, and his ears rang with the sounds of a mother's screams as her children were struck down in front of her eyes. It was like a scene from a nightmare, and he'd helped make it happen. It wasn't just Muggles and mudbloods. They were killing witches and wizards. Going after their own.

Regulus felt a scream welling in his chest. He wanted to claw his newly given mark off his skin. To run and hide from what was his own choice. This wasn't what he'd wanted. This wasn't what he had been told.

The young Black was pulled out of his thoughts as a choking curse shot his way. Regulus lunged out of its range only to be grazed seconds later by an unseen stunner to the side.

Heart racing, Regulus winced and spun around to face his new attacker: a young wizard no older than himself. His expression was twisted in hate as tears rolled down his battered face. His sandy blond hair stuck fast to skin that shone with sweat, and his fingers were white as the wand under them. The hate was directed at him, he knew. At what he'd helped accomplished. At what he'd wanted and worked at for so long. A hate, Regulus thought to himself, that he wholly and rightfully deserved.

Regulus' heart lurched as he recognized the face. A pureblood Ravenclaw in sixth year like he was. They shared a few classes together and even spoke on rare occasions. Now they were trying to kill each other.

The boy's wand shot up, it's shaky aim pointed right at Regulus' heart, but before either could move so much as an inch more a spell collided with the Ravenclaw and his body exploded. He never even had the chance to scream.

Blood and flesh splattered Regulus and the surrounding ground in warm sticky globs. Clasping onto his mask. His skin. Anywhere it touched. The youngest Black brother's eyes widened as he felt bile burn at the back of his throat before he ripped off his mask, fell onto his hands and knees, and vomited. The acidic taste and smell burned the back of his throat just as the smoke did, and he could feel his eyes start to water at the sensation.

From across the street he could see a figure he knew by size, shape, and brutal method as Bellatrix. He could imagine the sneer shot at him from under her mask before she went rushing back into the fray cursing anyone unlucky enough to be stuck in her path. He knew what she thought of him. She thought he was weak. That he was a coward. Was she right? No one else was reacting like this. None of the others so much as paused that he could see. So why was he?

Regulus wiped his mouth on his sleeve and tried to push himself up off the ground. Rocks dug into his palms as the panicked mob of bodies pushed past, knocking him back down again before he could make it to his feet. Regulus didn't even bother to replace his mask. He still saw the venomous look in the boy's brown eyes. The pain. The grief. It was the same look his brother had given him when he'd found out what he'd become a part of.

Now, all he could see was Sirius standing there. His older brother being blown to bits by his cousin in front of his eyes. It was all so much clearer now. This was the reality. Not the boyish fantasy he'd dreamed up for himself for so long. There was no honor. There was no pride. Did the others not see what was happening? They acted like it was a game. A sport. He tried telling himself there was something he wasn't seeing. That they were more experienced, but it all rang hollow.

His legs felt like they'd been struck with a jelly-leg jinx as he finally managed to find his way to his feet and watched as the figure he knew by mask as Lucius ran past. Saw the pleasure and excitement in his movements as he fought. As he killed. The acidic taste of bile rose again, stomach threatening to empty whatever was left inside it.

They were all monsters, and now so was he. All he wanted was to make his parents proud. To have respect. 

The junior Death Eater dogged another hex fired his way and winced as his foot twisted out from under him, tripping over a hole that had been blasted into the ground, but again regained his balance and started toward the edge of the dueling crowd. He watched as robes swished and wands fired, their light reflecting in his gray eyes. Bitter thoughts swirled through his mind, self-hatred boiling as he was forced to blast a man out of his way, stepping over the body and racing on through the surrounding insanity.

Sirius was right all along. They used to be so close before he left. Before he started hanging around his Gryffindor friends and dropped 'little Reg' off into the background. There wasn't any time for his kid brother after that.

'Then he ran away and left me alone...'

Regulus stumbled his way to the edge of the crowd and almost fell again as someone stepped on his robe. Gritting his teeth, he caught himself on a charred building wall. Everything was blurred, and that's when he realized tears were falling down his face. He'd never allowed himself to cry in front of others. Blacks didn't show that kind of weakness. They were the pure. The elite. The strong, but those had all been lies. He was tired of what he felt, so he let them fall.

If only he hadn't been so stupid. If only he'd listened to his brother earlier. If only he hadn't been so desperate to believe that his parents were right. 

He again thought of the Ravenclaw boy. Of the pain. If only Regulus could go to his brother. Then Sirius could tell him what to do like when they had been children, comfort him like when Regulus was six and would go to his brother's room during a thunderstorm, or after a nightmare. Yet if he went to Sirius Regulus knew all he'd find was a door slammed in his face, and he'd deserve it. It was too late. Everything was too late, and nothing he could do would fix it. He didn't feel powerful like he thought he would. If anything, he'd had never felt so hopeless in his life.

Regulus sank back down to his knees as, above his head, the Dark Mark glowed a ghastly green.

\-------------------------------------------------------------- 

That night he came home a family hero. His mother praised him, just as he'd always dreamed, but he didn't want her praise now. They didn't understand what it was like to look into the eyes of a child and have to kill them by their own hand. They didn't know what it was like to watch the life suddenly vanish from a little girl's frightened blue eyes. Didn't know the pain of hearing her mother's screams. To witness her older brother begging to die in his sister's place. For her father give his life while trying to save her.

Would his family have done that for him? Cared enough to put their own necks on the line for his? When he was younger he'd believed that his family knew everything, but now he found that they knew nothing. Nothing at all.

It was almost four in the morning before he was able to escape to the safety of his bedroom. Shedding his stained Death Eater uniform, he threw it in a pile on the floor and put on his emerald and silver night robes in its place before sinking down onto his bed.

Regulus wouldn't be able to sleep now. Too much had happened. Too much guilt had settled down inside his chest. 

Then he heard a pop.

"Master Regulus has returned. Is there anything Kreacher can do for his young master?" Recognizing the scratchy old voice, Regulus' gaze landed on the bat like ears and large beady eyes of his family's old house-elf, and a small smile flickered onto his face. No matter what anyone else may have thought they knew about Regulus Kreacher was the only one who was ever a friend to him. Who really knew him. Sirius never understood his like for the old elf, but Sirius never took the time to be nice to Kreacher, either.

"Not right now, but thank you. I will call if I need anything," He answered, and the house elf bowed once before he popped back out of the room.

Regulus was alone again.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two: One year later, 1978.  
  
  
It had been a year since he'd accepted the mark, and it was one full of regret that he could not shake. He couldn't voice what he felt, not to anyone, and so the regrets stayed sitting deep under his skin.   
  
In that year he'd changed. Anyone with a working set of eyes could see that. Regulus wasn't the little boy who used to run off to his older brother's room during a thunderstorm, nor was he the teenager who believed that he knew it all. No, he'd seen too much to remain so ignorant. Ignorance could no longer be afforded.His skin had grown paler, his silver robes hung loose on his thin frame, and his gray eyes now held a hollow, haunted look that made him seem increasingly older than his seventeen years.   
  
  
_ "The Death Eaters stuck once more last night, reducing the Muggle Village of St. Marsh to rubble. The exact number of casualties resulting from the attack has yet to be confirmed. Worse, the Aurors, led by renowned dark wizard catcher, Alabaster Moody, still refuse to provide us with a statement. With such a dangerous lack of information forthcoming, more now than ever before, everyone is advised to remain indoors after hours and under no circumstances to wander out alone. Above all else, follow the safety guidelines posted and if the worst happens, please contact-" _   
  
The announcer of WWN was cut off mid-sentence as Regulus flicked his wand and switched off the Wizard wireless from across the room, not so much as glancing up from the leather bound book resting open in his lap. He hardly needed the wizard news to tell him what he had witnessed firsthand.   
  
  
Regulus flipped another yellowing page, eyes only halfhearted scanning through the words. With an irritated shake of his head he flipped to the next page and moved on, grimacing as an image of a man, all too obviously in pain, was illuminated in the flickering light of the Black's library fireplace.   
  
He'd been searching for months, looking for some way to rid himself of the mark that had been seared onto his forearm. If the information he was looking for was anywhere, he'd find it within the hundreds of volumes on the Dark Arts located in his family's library. Books had been passed down all the way from the very first of the Blacks, the collection growing larger and larger with every new generation, and with so many books at hand it was only logical to assume at least one of them contained a clue that could point him towards what he was looking for. There had to be something he was missing. Something that he'd looked over.   
  
Regulus turned the last of the pages and slammed the covers shut, tossing the dusty text into the still growing heap of books piled up on the rug.   
  
"So much for that one... I-" Regulus hissed and clutched at his forearm. Pulling up his sleeve, his heart dropped to his stomach as he witnessed the Dark Mark flare briefly crimson.

* * *

Regulus Apparated to a point about half a mile away from his true destination, unable to get any closer due to the charms placed around the area. The rest of the way he'd be forced to travel by foot, and so he began the uphill hike.   
  
The woods surrounding him were deathly quiet. No birds sang, no leaves rustled in the wind, and no animals called out to each other in the late afternoon air. The only sound that could be heard was Regulus' footsteps crunching through the dry underbrush. Not even animals were foolish enough to live in such a place. The very air tingled with a sense of darkness. So thick it was almost tangible. The wards around the area were hardly even needed to keep nosy adventurers away, as any rational being with half a brain would turn and run on all on it's own.   
  
Twenty minutes later he arrived at a manor located in a large clearing. There were no walls blocking the view, as there was no need. The charms more than took care of that. Obsidian gargoyles glared down from the walls as three floors of white marble loomed above him. Every time he was summoned he couldn't help thinking it was one of the most beautiful places he had seen, but at the same time the most horrible. The structure radiated evil, and looking past the plastered marble and beauty, you could see the signs of something far darker. The very air shimmered with Dark Magic, and the grass around the edges of the yard had long ago shriveled up and died. Inside the yard the image was maintained. No living things thrived within the invisible barrier, only solid stone.   
  
He shivered as he felt himself pass through the shields, dark mark tingling. It was a special design, one only the chosen could go through. The wards responded to the mark, repelling any who dared tried to pass without it. The only way you could find yourself inside without the Death Eater signature would be to receive entrance from someone already admitted, and even then very few knew the way to do so. Most who did enter this way did not do so of their own will, and hardly any of those ever left alive to reveal the Dark Lord’s secret. It may have looked like a manor, but any who had been inside and lived to tell knew different. In reality, it was nothing short of a fortress.   
  
He came to a halt outside the entrance, and as he was looking up at the dark doors, standing out so sharply against the white stone around it, he waited. He waited and he thought. Thought about his brother, his life, and all the other things that seemed to find themselves into his brain of late. It almost hurt to think of them, but he didn't know how not to. It was as if he couldn't ignore the nagging in his mind, as if they wouldn't let him ignore them.   
  
"Regulus." 

  
"Lucius." He replied. Lucius Malfoy stood in full Death Eater garb, saluted against the dark doorway. With a wordless jerk of the head, he beckoned the young Black to follow.   
  
The courtyard made way to plush green carpet and detailed tapestries lining the walls as the doors closed noiselessly behind them and they started towards the heart of the manor.   
  
"I don't suppose you know why we were called?" The young Malfoy had been steadily working his way up through the ranks, and it was common knowledge that almost no one knew more of their lord's plans then he. As both members of ancient pureblood families, they had known each other far longer than most realized. Lucas' actions and tactics revolted Regulus, but at the same time the man was an ally you would be a fool to turn down.   
  
"Impatient, are we?" Lucas smiled.   
  
"Not particularly to tell the truth, more curious...and maybe a bit apprehensive."   
  
Lucius gave a slight nod of understanding, then, faster than he would like, they'd arrived at the heart of the manor.   


* * *

The Dark Lord stared down at the Death Eater trembling at his feet, his thin lips twisting into a smile. It was the kind of smile that sent shivers up your spine. Cold, evil, and undoubtedly cruel.   
  
"Look at me," he commanded, and the man unwillingly obeyed, flinching as his frightened green eyes met the blood red gaze of his master. Regulus watched on silently with the rest of the Death Eaters, expectant dread filling the air. It was clear to all of them what was coming.   
  
They watched as the Dark Lord casually circled their comrade, toying with his wand. Despite the casual tone of voice and uncaring stance, Regulus could see the anger that flashed in his eyes.   
  
"I trusted you Dedrick, trusted you with such a very simple task, and yet again you failed me. I assume you know what the price of such a failure is," the question left his lips smooth as silk, but there was no question how thin a wire the kneeling man now walked.   
  
"My lord, please. Let me expl-"   
  
"Silence!" Dedrick cowered away at the sudden explosion of anger, and a few of the newer recruits took a step back as well. No one could blame them. They'd all experienced his displeasure at least once, and none were in a hurry to feel it again.   
  
The smile was back, but it only made him all the more terrifying.   
  
"I didn't say you could speak." He continued pacing, watching. "That's what you said last time. Word for word as I recall. I've already given you more mercy then you deserve. All you had to do was kill the mark I assigned you, yet you let the girl slip from your grasp. Her father was out on an auror assignment, her mother was asleep, and it was all lined up perfectly in your favor. It would have been such an easy task. Simply slip inside and kill a two year old. Hardly a challenge. Yet still you failed me. Why is that?" The man was smart enough not to answer.   
  
"We were trying to make a point, to show her fool of a father what happened to those who meddled where they shouldn't, but instead you've made me look like a fool. This was your last chance, Dedrick." Their master slowly raised his wand.   
  
"Wait, please! It wasn't my fault!"   
  
"Avada Kedavra." The green light struck him square in the chest as the former Death Eater slumped to the floor. The watching audience didn't respond.   
  
"Take him away." Two hooded figures immediately detached themselves from the watching crowd and hurried away with Dedrick, obviously finding a dead body much more pleasant than staying in the room with an angry dark wizard.   
  
The Dark Lord turned his back on the rest of them. "Go, except for you, Regulus." Regulus froze, sweat beginning to fall down his face. "I have a favor to ask of you." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, here's the second chapter! Please leave a Kudos and review if you liked it! Even a few words means a lot. :)
> 
> The next chapter should be up soon.


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